Sep 052012

Last week I wrote an open letter to introverts in the church (I, too, am an introvert). I mentioned some of the misunderstandings people have about introverts and some of the struggle introverts face – particularly in the church setting.

I think it’s important that we understand who God made us to be, realizing our needs and limits. But I also think it’s important that we don’t use our personalities to excuse poor behavior.

“I don’t do sensitive; I’m an INTJ.”

“I can’t help but push you out of the way and take control; it’s my personality.”

“It’s not my fault I forgot to follow through (again); it’s how God made me.”

Nope. That’s not how it works. Knowing our personalities and the personalities of those we live and work with gives us greater insight into living well. When we understand our personalities, we can better understand our strengths and our weaknesses. But our personalities should never be used as an excuse for poor behavior.

“As an introvert it makes me uncomfortable to talk to new people, so I won’t.”

Nope, not cutting it.

“As an introvert it makes me uncomfortable to talk to new people, but I’ll do it anyway because I know it’s important to make others feel welcome. I’ll also make sure that after I spend time in an umcomfortable setting, I give myself time to recharge.”

Yup, that’ll do.

Do you notice personalities getting used as a cover up for poor behavior?

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 Posted by at 12:01 am

  2 Responses to “On Not Using Our Personalities As Excuses”

  1. I always enjoy reading your blogs. I too used to be an intracert. Not because I was shy and scared to talk to people but because I was scared someone might find the truth out about what was going in my home as a child. While that is another topic of discussion, I found through volubteering at Sav-A-Life and then being offered the position of Office Manager, we needed to open up to the ladies who were facing the same struggles I faced as a child/teenager. It allowed the healing I needed to receive in order to be the one God had originally created me to be. As I go with Sav-A-Life speaking at different churches or functions, I find that people will love me no matter what. I realized then that there are different types of intraverts. Some are just naturally born that way and others, like me, think they have to remain closed off to people to be liked. I am glad I am the person God made me to be. Most people would never believe I was ever an intravert! Thank you for sharing you heart Steph!

    • Thanks for sharing part of your story, Gerri. It’s always wonderful to see God using situations (even very difficult ones) to help others. I’m so glad you’ve been able to receive healing through helping others. And that you’ve been able to let down your guard and allow people to get to know who you really are.

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